Bonding is creating a close and valued relationship. An ongoing relationship.
Lets look at a few dictionary definitions of relationship:
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According to the Merriam-Webster, it's the state or character of being
related. The Random House calls it an emotional or other connection between
people. The Oxford says it's the state of being related. I say it's all that
goes on between people, once they have connected.
We're going to look at your relationships with decision-makers who can buy
your services or products. And we must first recognize your most important
relationship -- your relationship with you.
You're the best you there is. There will never be another you. And you've got
this one-way ticket-to life. You've got your shot at making a difference. And
the better you relate with your prospects and customers, the more of a
difference you can make.
Your
accountabilities:
1. So your first accountability
is to yourself.
You are accountable for offering the very finest products and services
appropriate for your market-available to you. For continuing to stretch and grow
as a person. For being accountable for your presence here.
To help this happen, regard yourself as a work of art in process -as a
living human treasure. Be sensitive to the attitude of the decision-maker.
Ask yourself if this transaction feels like a fit, feels like it's right for
your client and for you. Do you feel good about yourself; is your conscience
clear after this transaction?
2. Instead of pitching your
products and services, analyze the possibilities for a mutual exchange of
values.
Look for the chance of long-term synergy rather than a one-time sale. For
in-depth connection. For relationship. At the very least you want to know there
will be referrals and recommendations flowering from this agreement or this
sale.
You want this to be the beginning and not the end. If there is to be no
chance for introductions to others who can buy your wares-as an outcome of
your giving your all, and treating all affected parties with high honor-then
you are accountable for seriously considering whether you want this
transaction at all.
3. You're accountable for your
comfort level relating with this decision-maker.
Choose to offer only the services and products that feel right to you. Take
into account this person and their needs, their situation and responsibilities.
Plus possible end-users and all others affected by what you propose.
4. Put the cherry on the top:
Go the extra mile.
It feels so g-o-o-o-d. Include something extra. Always. Something not expected.
Something not required. Something above and beyond. A surprise that delights the
decision-maker.
When I was 7 or 8, there were 4 little ice cream parlors within a few
blocks of my home in Ventnor, New Jersey. I'd check out each store to see
where I got the best deal for my five cents. The ice cream cones were all
about the same size.
However, at one of the stores the person behind the counter would dip the
ice cream cone into a bowl of jimmies (little chocolate sprinkles) and then
hand me the ice cream cone. Which ice cream parlor do you think got all my
business?
Ground Rules:
1. Accept this truth -- decision-maker is already doing her best. There may
be imposed policies she can't change. Maybe there are ritualized procedures she
must abide by to keep her job. Go along. Be detached about it.
2. Do not invest emotion in outcomes. Be unconcerned about whether or not you
get a specific sale or client.
3. Offer your services at a fair fee. Have a "take it or leave it"
attitude. No one transaction matters.
4. Have resolute, impeccable, untouchable integrity. It's not enough to
simply do what you say you'll do. More than that, be predictable and reliable in
every way relative to your word.
5. Include a bit of fun. Light-hearted, with good-will and tongue-in-cheek.
Be a little off-the-wall when possible. Be sure there's elation in your
relationship.
6. Say "Thank you." Express appreciation and gratitude as often as
possible. With the decision-maker. With everyone. People talk. Word gets back
that you're nice. Decision-makers like to relate with nice people.
7. Remember: you create, promote, or allow everything that happens in your
relationship with the decision-maker -- and all others.
* BONUS: Let the Platinum Rule guide your every action. Do unto others as
they would have you do unto them.
About the Author:
Burt Dubin, a 20 year veteran of
the business of speaking, coaches and mentors speakers and wanna-be's
world-wide. For samples of his wisdom, simply go to his web-site, http://www.SpeakingBizSuccess.com
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