|
Focus
on Your Potential
Find Your Strengths
Setting Goals
The Benefit of Research
The Power of Visualization
Necessary Traits
Breaking Bad Habits
Dealing with Other People
Improving Level of Efficiency
So how do you beat
procrastination
The Art of Delegation
(article continued below ...)
If you want to make more
of your talents and live up to your full potential, you have to
learn to use them. You have the power to change your habits - to
acquire new skills and fully use the skills you now have. You can
improve your performance, your productivity, and the quality of
your whole life.
What makes a high
achiever? Is it luck, intelligence, talent, dedication? All of
these things figure in - they all make a difference. But we all
know intelligent, talented, hard-working people who do not
consider themselves very successful or even happy. And we know
people who are not exceptionally bright but seem happy and
successful.
So there must be
something else, some secret to success. Actually there are several
secrets to achieving your peak performance - living up to your
full potential. Your success at business, friendship, love, sports
- just about anything you try - is largely determined by your own
self-image. Your unhappiness is something you choose. So, you're
thinking no one chooses to be unhappy. Well, maybe not - but you
have to consciously choose to be happy, self-confident, and
successful.
Happiness is elusive
when we go after it directly. So is self-confidence.
Both seem to be more
"side-products" than something you can achieve in and
for itself. So how, then, can consciously choosing to be these
things be of any value? Well, the secret is to focus on other
things.
Focus
on your Potential
First, focus on your
potential. Begin by making a complete and accurate assessment of
your potential. To do this you must take an inventory of yourself-
you will make a few lists. Sit down and make a list of all the
things you can do well. Be honest with yourself. When that list is
done, make a list of all the things you like to do, even if you
think you can't do them well. Then, make a list of all the things
you would like to do, if you could. Now list your
hobbies.
Then, go back to the
list of things you can do well. You are probably being much too
hard on yourself. Most of us are. We have this little voice in our
heads telling us things like: "You're so dumb," or
"You can't learn to do that," or "You never do
anything right," or similar nasty things. And even worse, we
listen to that voice as if it's telling us the gospel truth. So
now, shut off that voice - you can do it - and add a few more
things to the list of things you can do well. Pretend you are your
best friend - it's amazing how much more forgiving and charitable
we are with our friends than we are with ourselves. Now that you
are your best friend, you should be able to add a few more items
to your "do well" list. But do be honest - don't list
things you feel you really can't do well.
Next, go to your list of
things you like to do but you feel you don't do well. Speaking as
your own best friend, do you think there are some things on this
list that could be moved to your "do well" list? There
probably are. If you like to do it, chances are you do pretty well
at it. Treat your hobby list in the same manner.
Next, go to your list of
things you would like to do if you could. Ask yourself, "Why
can't I do this, if I'd like to?" Put your reasons on another
list. OK. So you have a lot of lists going - what good is that
going to do? Well, you have just made an assessment of yourself.
If you have been truly honest in making these lists, it may even
be a fairly accurate assessment. Probably it isn't, but that's OK.
This assessment isn't carved in stone. It's subject to change. But
for now we will work with what's on the lists. At least you have a
place to start.
Look over your lists
again. You are focusing on all the things you feel you can't do
and the reasons why you can't do them, right? Well, don't. FOCUS
ON WHAT YOU CAN DO - FOCUS ON YOUR POTENTIAL. Make it a habit to
focus on your strengths. Don't forget to include your undeveloped
potential, as well. Train yourself to focus on your potential
instead of your limitations.
Now that's not to say
that you should ignore your list of reasons for not doing some of
the things you would like to do. Not at all! But look at them from
the viewpoint of your strengths. For instance, you'd like to play
basketball but you think you are too short, so you don't even try.
In this case, you are looking at it from the viewpoint of your
limitations. Now, when you look at it from the viewpoint of your
strengths, you would say, "Well, I may be pretty short to
play, BUT I am fast. I can handle the ball well. I have a lot of
stamina. I can't change being short, but I can refuse to let my
limitations overcome my strengths."
Find
Your Strengths
You see the difference?
Focusing on your limitations lets those limitations make your
decisions for you. Focusing on your strengths lets YOU make the
decision. To go back to our example: when you've decided to
overcome your height limitations to play basketball - something
you really want to do - you will be more determined to develop
your strengths to compensate. You will do well, because you will
be doing what you really want to do and you will be determined to
develop the full potential of your strengths. Very few people
concentrate on fully developing any of their strengths. That's
where you will have the edge. You know your true disadvantages but
your determination, your singleness of purpose, will inspire you
to fully develop the talents and skills you do
have.
OK. You probably have no
interest in playing basketball. Then go to your assessment of
yourself. What do you have a major interest in? What do you have a
natural aptitude for? Go for it. Devote yourself to something you
really like to do. Don't choose something just because you think
you could make more money at it than you could by doing something
else that you would really rather work at. You won't work to
develop your full potential. You may start out with enthusiasm,
but you will soon raise the flag. It will be a chore to go to
work. You'll probably find yourself hating to go. It'll be
difficult to work on improving your skills because you don't like
what you are doing. You probably won't be working up to your
potential. Your success will probably be limited by your growing
lack of interest and your happiness will surely be affected.
If, however, you devote
yourself to something you really like to do, you'll enjoy your
work, you'll be enthusiastic, and you'll probably find yourself
working on improving your skills just for the sheer joy of it. You
will be working to reach your full potential. You'll probably soon
find you are making more money at this truly interesting
occupation than you ever dreamed possible. And because you like
what you are doing, you will be happier.
When you know you are
working to your full potential and you enjoy your work and begin
to feel successful, you will find that self-confidence and
happiness soon follow.
Setting
Goals
But, you must be
realistic and honest with yourself. If you set goals that you
can't possibly reach, you are setting yourself up for failure. You
will make yourself frustrated and unhappy. The key here is a
realistic and honest assessment of your
potential.
Although most people
will be unnecessarily harsh in their assessments, it is easy to
become too hopeful when you start breaking down barriers. If, for
instance, you're extremely interested in and fond of music and
would love to be a singer, it would be unreasonable to set a
singing career as your goal if you can't sing a note (some talents
are inborn). But if you are knowledgeable about the music business
and would be happy being involved in some other capacity, then it
would be reasonable to pursue a career in the business.
Be wary of making
otherwise perfectly reasonable goals unattainable because of
stringent time frames. When you set a goal, you will most likely
set times for achieving certain steps along your way to achieving
your final goal. Even if you don't set the time frames formally,
you will probably have a pretty good idea of how long you are
giving yourself. It's wise to sit down and formally set these
goals. Think about it and give yourself reasonable time to achieve
them. Make a deal with yourself to view these time limits as
flexible.
Don't get discouraged if
things don't work out as planned. Sometimes finding our place
takes both time and error. All of us experience failures of one
magnitude or another. The key is to view the failures as a
learning experience - if nothing else, failures teach us what not
to do. Remain flexible. As long as you keep focusing on your
strengths and potential, the right thing will come along - and
probably sooner rather than later. But don't quit at the first
sign of boredom. Even if you have truly found your niche, you will
not feel enthusiastic 100 percent of the time.
Don't worry about others
- don't compare your progress with that of others. No matter how
successful you are, there will be someone else who, to you, looks
like she's got it made - who looks like she’s getting where you
want to go faster and easier than you are. Maybe she is. Maybe she
isn't. Who cares? Focus on your own achievements. Work to develop
your skills and talents to their full potential. Compete with
yourself - your short term goals should be based on today's
accomplishments. If you have reached Point A today, make Point B
your next objective - improve yourself and don't worry about the
other guy.
OK. You have decided
what your ultimate goal is. Make sure it is a definitely defined
goal. "Someday I want to be famous" just won't cut it.
Define exactly what you want to do. Define a reasonable time
frame. Know what you have to do to get there. You don't need to
know every little detail, but you do have to have the big picture
and many of the details.
If you have a goal in
mind but don’t know what it takes to reach it, then you need to
find out. Do some reading, talk to people who know, ask questions
and LISTEN to the answers. Think that sounds like a lot of work?
Well, remember what you are preparing for - your success and
happiness. Surely, you want to put a little effort into that!
Anyway, a little research into what it will take for you to reach
your goals isn't too difficult.
The
Benefit of Research
Train yourself into
making this "research" the next focus of your
life.
You will be focusing on
your strengths, on your purpose, and on learning and doing. If you
have chosen a goal that is right for you, focusing on these things
and devoting the necessary time should not be too difficult. It
may take a bit of self-discipline at first, but your determination
and interest will carry you through until the focusing process
becomes a habit. When you have a real desire to accomplish
something, initiative should only require an occasional shove -
but you may need to give it a nudge now and again.
The
Power of Visualization
Get into the habit of
visualizing your success. Now sitting around and daydreaming in
generalizations about it is not what we mean. You need to
visualize specifics. To return to the basketball example,
daydreaming about being carried off the court on your teammates'
shoulders is just daydreaming. Picturing in your mind how you will
work a play if your opponent makes a particular move, picturing
your exact response to it, is visualizing specifics. If you run
through specific moves in your mind, you will be prepared when the
need for those moves arises.
Don't be afraid to use
your imagination to visualize new and better ways to accomplish
things, as well. Here in your mind, you can try doing things in
ways that are different from the usual. This is a creative process
- you may have heard of creative thinking. Training yourself to
think creatively is largely learning to let your imagination work
on methods that are different from the "way things have
always been done." It's breaking away from the idea that a
thing can be done effectively in only one way. It's looking at a
problem from all angles. Just play a game of "what if."
Ask yourself, "What if I did this thing this way?" It's
OK to get a little crazy sometimes. But, you must also spend some
of your thinking time at specific visualizations of the moves you
need to make to accomplish your goals.
Visualizations are
important but actual physical practice of your skills is
important, too. Practice the boring little skills that are
necessary as well as the skills that you enjoy. Don't let yourself
rely on just the things that come naturally and easy to you.
Develop your limited potentials as well as those that you feel are
your assets.
Necessary
Traits
Work on developing the
more general attributes that are important to almost any
goal:
- Success comes more
easily to those who have a pleasing personality. This is not
to say that you should bend to everyone's wishes or scrape and
bow. Rather, develop an attitude that is respectful of other's
opinions but true to your own beliefs. Be flexible - don't be
so rigid that you can't accept another's opinion when it is
superior to your own. Be willing, even eager, to learn from
others. Changing your opinion in light of more facts is a sign
of strength of character, not weakness. Be willing to extend a
helpful hand, be a team player. Develop a sense of humor. Be
polite and caring - but be your own person.
- Learn to guard
against emotional responses. You are susceptible to errors of
judgment when you let your emotions get in the way. Of course,
everything we do is done based somewhat on our emotions, but
strong emotions have little place in decision making. Hold
your emotions in check. Try to delay decisions if you are in
an emotional state. Learn to ignore your emotions and use
reasoning to arrive at your decisions.
- Develop the habit of
enthusiasm. Enthusiasm works like a magnet - it draws people
and success. It's a pleasing personality trait that people
like to be a part of. It seems to be contagious - the people
around you become enthusiastic, too, and become more
cooperative. Enthusiasm sparks initiative and singleness of
purpose.
Breaking
Bad Habits
We've talked of working
to develop habits - the habit of focusing on your goals, the habit
of focusing on your strengths, the habit of learning and
"researching," the habit of visualizing, the habit of
enthusiasm. Now we will talk of habits in a little different light
- breaking them. First, assess your habits looking for the ones
that may be displeasing to others. Offensive habits can hold you
back from success - they are often a part of an unpleasing
personality. Look for things like grumbling or grunting at people
instead of answering, gazing at anything but the speaker when
conversing, smirking or sneering when you don't agree - anything
that is an automatic, displeasing mannerism. It will be very
difficult to assess your habits accurately. After all, a habit is
something that we do without thinking much about it. You will have
to spend some time at this and be very conscious of yourself. Ask
someone you trust to help you with this assessment. It may take a
lot of work to break yourself of displeasing habits. Try
substituting a different, more pleasing behavior for the habit you
wish to break.
OK. You have set
definite goals, you have a definiteness of purpose, you have
researched and know the specific steps to take to achieve the
goals, you have resolved to be flexible and to develop a more
pleasing personality. Now what?
Well, just because you
have a clear purpose, know what you want, are willing to work on
developing your potential, and willing to be a nice person,
success will not drop into your lap overnight.
You will probably find
that one of your first steps in achieving your goals will be to
take a job somewhat below where you hope eventually to be. But
you've already analyzed the steps to your goal, so you presumably
have planned for this. However, you do want to advance and, of
course, as quickly as possible.
Dealing
with Other People
As you advance toward
your goals, you will undoubtedly run up against some difficult
people (maybe even difficult bosses), and there will be times
you'll need to deal effectively with them. Since you are working
on becoming a nice, enthusiastic person and a team player, you
already have half the battle won. Your attitude is as important as
the other guy's attitude when you are dealing with difficult
people.
Always keep in mind that
your job is a training field for you. You are getting paid as you
learn the things you need to know to achieve your goals. Pretty
good deal, right? If you view your job as a paid opportunity to
advance toward your goals, you will be an asset to your boss. You
will also be a happier, more productive person. Viewing your job
in this manner will allow you to view the difficult people you
will inevitably need to deal with as an opportunity to grow. From
them and the situations they create, you will learn to negotiate
with, side-step around, and draw out the best in others without
letting yourself become upset. Each time you successfully deal
with one of these people you will gain confidence and probably
friends to add to your support network. The skill of negotiating
with difficult people and the confidence you have gained from
these encounters comes in handy when you are ready to ask for a
promotion or raise - even if your boss happens to be a nice
person.
Successful negotiation
is not a contest of wills - it is working together to solve a
problem or come to an agreement. It is an opportunity to learn how
others feel about the issue.
Always be prepared. Know
who you are talking with. Always know as much as possible about
the person. Know about the person's marital status, family,
hobbies, education, difficulties, attitudes, and whatever else you
can learn. The information may give you an understanding of the
person. If you know the circumstances, you will more easily find
the most effective way to get your point across. At the very
least, the information will make the person seem more familiar
which will give you more self-confidence.
Know the issue - not
just your opinions about it. Be able to back up your opinions with
reasons and research. If you are asking for a promotion, know the
demands of the job in question. Know and be honest about how much
of the job you are already qualified to do and how much additional
training you will need. If you may not be as qualified as someone
else applying, be prepared to negotiate for a smaller-than-offered
salary until you are fully trained - remember the training is
worth a lot to you. Be enthusiastic and focus on your strengths -
don't boast but give a simple and accurate listing of the
strengths you feel make you a good candidate for this
job.
The strengths you cite
can and should include specific job related skills, your present
accomplishments on the job, your interest in the field (not just
this job), your enthusiasm, your ability to work as a team member,
and other personal traits that will be an asset on the job.
Always enter into
negotiations with a calm and reasonable manner. Don't let emotion
and emotional outbursts have a place at the negotiating table. You
must be in control of yourself if you want to get your point
across. People are more likely to listen to your views if you
present them in a calm and reasonable manner. Present your ideas
with conviction but don't try to intimidate others or be
demanding. State your views simply, completely, and orderly. When
you are expressing an opinion rather than a fact, use a qualifying
"1 think" or "In my opinion." When others are
expressing their views, listen carefully and ask questions if
something isn't clear. Don't disagree until you are sure you
understand their position. When you do disagree, do so in a
pleasant non-threatening way. "I see what you mean,
but..." or "I can understand why you think that,
but..." are a couple of good ways to begin a statement of
disagreement. Be courteous and leave them a chance to save face.
Be prepared to face
people who are not calm and reasonable. Don't let them get to you.
Remain calm and reasonable and even be a little sympathetic. Let's
say you have entered into negotiations with your boss for a raise
and he blows up with, "I can't afford to give you a raise.
This business isn't exactly a gold mine. Don't you realize how
tough times are?" Remain calm. Put yourself in his shoes. Try
to find something you can agree and sympathize with. For instance,
look sympathetic and agree, "I know you have a lot of
expenses and you work hard to keep this business going. It must be
really difficult for you sometimes." This will probably not
be the response he expects. It will probably take the wind out of
his sails. Most likely he will calm down, and since you are
sympathetic to his problems, he'll be more willing to listen to
you. If you remain calm, reasonable, and sympathetic, he will calm
down. When he is calmer, discuss with him the reasons you are a
valuable asset to him. Don't threaten but calmly and reasonably
discuss the bargain a small raise is. With that small raise, he'll
be keeping a happy and fully trained employee who knows the
company. When you consider the expense of finding and training
another individual, giving you a raise is a bargain for your
boss.
article continues below...
Play "Let's Make A
Deal." Be prepared to deal. Don't expect to get everything
you want. If you are willing to gracefully make some concessions,
you will be more likely to arrive at a satisfactory deal. After
all, a negotiation has at least two opposing sides. This means
someone else has something they want, too - even if that something
is simply to leave things as they are. Arrive at a compromise that
everyone can live with. Remember, you are working at long-range
goals, and you may be negotiating with them again.
Developing your
potential more fully is a key to happiness and fulfillment.
Although we have primarily discussed this in terms of a job, these
same concepts can be used in many other areas of your
life.
Improving
Level of Efficiency
In developing your
potential to it's fullest, you will want to become a more
efficient person - get more done in less time - so you can take
full advantage of the opportunities that you make for yourself.
You will note that most effective, successful people seem to
accomplish a great deal. It's true that this is partly due to
enthusiasm, but there's more to it.
The first barrier to
efficiency is procrastination - putting off getting started.
Sometimes you know you are procrastinating. You may not want to do
the task at hand so you keep putting it off until tomorrow. The
thing to do is to look at it from a different angle. If it'll have
to be done sometime, tell yourself, "why not do it now, and
get it off your back."
And that's just where it
is! On your back dragging you down. Putting things off makes
everything harder to do. If you keep putting things off, you'll
soon have several things piling up, and then the sheer number of
tasks you have backed up will make it seem impossible to ever get
caught up. This affects everything you do try to do.
Sometimes you don't even
realize you are putting things off. You may keep yourself
extremely busy doing things of little importance to unconsciously
give yourself excuses for doing the things you really should be
doing. You say to yourself, "Look how busy I am. I just can't
get everything done." But the result is the same as when you
know you are procrastinating. It soon bogs you down. All you are
doing is "running in place."
So
how do you beat procrastination?
The first step in
beating procrastination is to admit to yourself how often you do
it and assessing your methods of doing it. Not very difficult,
really, when you become aware of the tactics some of us use to
hide from ourselves what we are doing.
The key in overcoming
procrastination and becoming more efficient is organization. Plan
ahead. Know what you want to accomplish today, this week, and in
the long haul.
Make lists. The lists
for today will probably be more detailed than the longer-term
lists. That's OK. Now look over the lists and rank the tasks in
order of importance. Make three or four groupings based on
importance. Within each group, star the things you least like to
do.
Each day you will have a
"today" list to work on. Tackle the tasks that are most
important first. If you have several "most important"
tasks on your list, take on the least liked things in that
grouping before you do the better liked ones. When you have
accomplished a task, check it off. You'll be surprised what a good
feeling you have when you check things off. What a sense of
accomplishment! It's an incentive to do the next task on the list.
When you have completed the tasks in the first grouping, begin on
the list of next importance. Again do the starred items in that
group first. Keep on checking things off as you get them
done.
Do you see what is
happening? You get the most pressing, least liked tasks out of the
way early in the day when you are fresh and rested. As the day
goes on you will feel less and less pressure. You have reserved
the less important tasks for the end of the day when you will be
more tired.
With this system you
will have not only increased your efficiency but also reduced some
of the stress in your day. Stress can get in the way of
efficiency. Your new efficiency will help you develop your
potential. It is, in fact, a part of living up to your
potential.
Another important part
of efficiency is in delegating work. If you are in a position
where you have assistants or designated people under your
supervision, you need to learn to delegate. If you are not in such
a position yet, you still need to know - since you're working on
developing your potential you very likely will be some day.
The
Art of Delegation
Delegating work is
difficult for many people. Some find it hard to ask others to do
things for them - others find it hard not to demand that others do
tasks. Delegating is an art.
First, you need to
realize that the people under your supervision are PEOPLE. Seldom,
if ever, should you demand - that takes away self-respect. In
order to achieve a happy and co-operative crew, you need to help
them build self-respect and self-confidence. A happy and
co-operative crew is an asset to you. Demands do not promote
self-respect and co-operation.
Oh, it's probably
effective to demand in the short run - but in the long run you
will be better off to gain co-operation without demanding.
People who are asked to
do a task, are given explanations and clear instructions, and are
praised for a job well done will grow in self-respect. They will
also respect you as a good supervisor. If you hesitate to ask for
their assistance, your crew will feel that you do not trust them
or have faith in their abilities. This affects their self-respect
and, as a reaction, will affect their respect for you, as
well.
When you delegate work,
don't delegate just the "junk" tasks. Your crew needs to
be given some important tasks to do as well as unimportant ones.
The important task gives them a sense of the respect you have for
them and the faith you have in their abilities. It's a good idea
to save some "junk" tasks for yourself. Perhaps the most
respected and effective boss is the one about whom the crew says,
"She never gives us anything to do that she wouldn't do
herself." Why? Because, by her actions the boss is saying
that, though her position is above theirs, she is still just
"plain people."
Delegation of tasks is
important because you can gain in effectiveness and get more done
if you properly supervise a crew. Don't feel embarrassed or
hesitant about delegating work. If it helps you to shine, it helps
your crew shine, too. A well-run, effective department is a credit
to the whole team. With proper delegating, you can help your crew
achieve their potential as well as achieving your own.
All of us have untapped
potential - perhaps even areas of genius - that we have neglected
to develop. Whether your concept of success has to do with
business, love, friendship, sports, a combination of these or
something else, more fully developing your potential will help you
achieve your goals. If you can learn to assess your potential, set
realistic goals, and go after those goals with determination,
organization, and purpose, you will use your potential more fully,
gain confidence, and be a happier and more successful person.
|