Six Essentials for Networking

Networking is one of those activities that I do not really look forward to doing, but I know I have to do because of the many benefits it can bring to a business.

According to Christine Comaford-Lynch, author of the book "Rules for Renegades," networking is actually FUN. She wrote: "Networking is about creating an extended family. It’s about developing connections, caring about people, increasing the size of your “tribe.”

She gave six networking essentials:

1. Practice “Palm Up” Networking. When you network, are you giving, or grasping? Palm up networking embodies the spirit of service, of giving and wanting nothing in return. When you network “palm down” you’re grasping for personal gain. Palm up = heart-oriented interaction. Palm down = greedy grasping. Which attitude results in building relationships, providing value, and ultimately bestows benefits on both parties? You guessed it. The universe has a perfect accounting system. Give to others, it’ll all come back to you in time.

2. Do Daily Appreciation. Appreciate at least one person daily. Sometimes I do this via e-mail so I can be thorough. And often, to my delight, the recipient will tell me that they are saving the message for when they need a pick-me-up. You can also express appreciation over the phone or in person. Simply tell someone how much you appreciate who they are, what they do, whatever about them moves you. They’ll be flattered and you’ll feel great.

3. Equalize Yourself with Others. I believe we all have one unit of worth, no more, no less. No one can add to it, no one can take it away. We’re all equal. Just because someone is powerful, rich, famous doesn’t mean they are better than you. Practice equalizing yourself with others—this will enable you to more comfortably interact with others, and to reach out to people of all walks of life.

4. Rolodex Dip. This is a fun practice when you want to connect with someone but aren’t sure who. Flip through your contact database and pick a name. Then think of all the things you like about them. Now call them up to see how they are doing. They’ll be surprised and delighted.

5. Pick a “Sensei of the Day”: Each day I pick a sensei, a teacher. This is someone who has taught me a lesson or reminded me of something important in life. Your sensei can be a person, a pet, a plant, it doesn’t matter. The important thing is to acknowledge that there is much to learn and you are being offered valuable lessons constantly.

6. Do the Drive-By Schmooze. Parties, conventions, groups of all sorts are great opportunities to network, but sometimes you’ll be tired, not in the mood, or have too many events in one evening (like during holiday season!). This is when you’ll want to use the Drive-By Schmooze. Here’s how:

• Timebox your networking. Decide that in 30 minutes you’ll do a check-in to determine if you need to stay any longer.
• Set your goal. Determine the number of new connections you want to establish. Remember, your goal is meaningful connections, not simply contacts.
• Let your intuition guide you. OK, this may sound flaky, but it works! Stand near the door, in a corner, out of the way. Stop your thoughts. Internally ask to be guided to the people you need to connect with. Then start walking. You’ll be amazed at who you meet.
• Connect. You’ll always resonate with someone at an event. When you do, ask questions about them, such as: How did you get started in your field? What’s your ideal customer? We all love to talk about ourselves, and these questions will not only help you form a connection with this person, but will also tell you how to help them.
• Offer help and follow through. If you can provide help, jot down ideas on the back of their business card, commit to follow up, and then do it. If you’ve had a fruitful conversation and want to take it further, offer to meet for lunch or coffee. People say life is 90% about showing up. Nonsense! Life is 90% about following through!
  
  

Top 10 Turn-Offs About Networking

Networking is not my forte; in fact, I am more comfortable at times just being the wallflower. That's why I am looking forward to reading the new book "Make Your Contacts Count: Networking Know-How for Business and Career Success" by Anne Barker and Lynne Waymon.

From the book, the authors made a list of the top 10 expressions people use when they are talking about networking that can make you cringe:

1. Schmoozing = this word makes networking seem so slimy and insincere. Networking is about teaching your contacts to believe in your character and competence so they want to work with you, send business your way or hire you
2. 30 Second Commercial = while you want to "sell yourself" you don't want to appear as too much of a hard sell
3. Pick Your Brains = this expression makes the authors think of vultures coming in for the kill; and wish that people would instead say "I'd like to get your thoughts about something."
4. Work a Room = this phrase sounds as if you intend to work people over and take all you can. Instead, focus on listening and showing others what they can count on you for and what kinds of opportunities to send your way.
5. Information Interview = You can make networking a way of life -- at professional meetings, backyard barbeques and all kinds of professional and social venues.
6. Tricks of the Trade = there should be no "tricks when you network; only upfront, clear offers to be helpful to each other
7. Favor Bank = give without strings, without expectations of getting -- that's the way to create a network that works
8. Power Lunch = this term sounds too much as if you value people just for their positions
9. Business Card Exchange = your goal is to build real connections, not "cardboard connections"
10. Important People = give your whole attention to the person you are with. Anyone can turn out to be a valuable contact!